Pre-parenting Lessons. Lynn, you only have a little time to get this done!

Lesson 1

1. Go to the grocery store.

2. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to their head office.

3. Go home.

4. Pick up the paper.

5. Read it for the last time.

Lesson 2

Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...

1. Methods of discipline.

2. Lack of patience.

3. Appallingly low tolerance levels.

4. Allowing their children to run wild.

5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.

Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 3

A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...

1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5PM to 10PM carrying a wet bag weighing approximately 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly. (Eat cold food with one hand for dinner)

2. At 10PM, put the bag gently down, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.

3. Get up at 12 and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1AM.

4. Set the alarm for 3AM.

5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2AM and make a drink and watch an infomercial.

6. Go to bed at 2:45AM.

7. Get up at 3AM when the alarm goes off.

8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4AM.

9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive)

Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4

Can you stand the mess children make? T o find out...

1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.

2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.

3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.

4. Then rub them on the clean walls.

5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.

6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons. How does that look?

Lesson 5

Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.

1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.

2. Attempt to put the octopus into the bag so that none of the arms hang out.

Time allowed for this - all morning.

Lesson 6

Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.

1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.

Leave it there.

2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.

3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle cheerios all over the floor, then smash them with your foot.

4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 7

Go to the local grocery store. Take with you the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 8

1. Hollow out a melon.

2. Make a small hole in the side.

3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.

4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.

5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.

6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.

You are now ready to feed a nine- month-old baby.

Lesson 9

Learn the names of every character from Sesame Street , Barney, Disney, the Teletubbies, and Pokemon. Watch nothing else on TV but PBS, the Disney channel or Noggin for at least five years. (I know, you're thinking What's 'Noggin'?) Exactly the point.

Lesson 10

Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 11

Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt- sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from Lesson 10 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

This is all very tongue in cheek; anyone who is parent will say 'it's all worth it!' Share it with your friends, both those who do and don't have kids. I guarantee they'll get a chuckle out of it. Remember, a sense of humor is one of the most important things you'll need when you become a parent!

35 Years

After church today when I saw you at the end of the hall, it was like I jumped back about 36 years for a second. Those days at the Arcata building! Ah yes – couldn’t forget that. Crazy that just yesterday I read in the paper that Arcata okayed the permit to tear down that building. As sad as it is to see that building go, hey, they can’t separate me from the memories! It’s powerfully sentimental to think of my young man boyish self from those days and meeting up with you. Good times. In so many ways. Glad I came to Humboldt County and drank deep of its natural resources!

I am not sure about being called a natural resource! Natural, yes…that is why you liked me so much. I remember that several girls had a crush on the handsome boy from LA. I felt so lucky to be the girlfriend of such an adorable and smart guy. We could talk about anything for hours. Remember how my mom loved to watch us sit on the floor in the living room of my house and be oblivious of the world around us as we conversed and laughed. We never ran out of things to talk about.

Yeah. Your mom. Great lady – little did I know at the time the level of her.. – I’m not sure what to call it – eccentricity? Nerve? Pizzazz? What ever it was/is, she had plenty of it! As the years went by, I came to appreciate how much it sometimes bothered you. I just laughed it off, but you had to grow up with it and deal with her on a much more personal and up front way. Ya did good. I know sometimes she was really uncool to ya. I think about how you were sometimes bothered by the thought that you might unknowingly adopt some of her character traits that you did not admire. I always laughed that off too. You are you. Unique, caring, perceptive, thoughtful, sensitive. Enjoy yourself and your legacy.

That reminder has been a comfort to me. You were my greatest support! But I think you liked many of the character traits I did get from her. You always treated my mother with great love and care. She LOVED you for it, and I can see that you have treated me with the same devotion when I have been less than easy to live with. You never hit me, called me names, etc., but I did make you mad plenty of times. You saved your real anger for the kids. Remember the doorknob through the wall and the broken baking dish? It is funny that you never really spanked them, but the house took a beating!

THAT is funny. The burn is that I ended up having to fix the house that took the beating. You’re right, though – there’s no abuse legacy in the fam. I feel pretty confidant that got passed onto the next gen. I mean really, look at your sons. Real lurking violent guys, eh? It never ceases to amaze me the kind of children you raised and the adults they have become. How is it possible? Why the lack of animosity? Why the understanding and the compassion and the friendship? Everyone of ‘em are fun to be around. Thanks.

There is a definite explanation. No matter how stern or strict I was, a gentle, sweet, fun father was there to give them a happy childhood. Looking at this from the perspective of time, I would say that you became more strict (especially as a Probation Officer!!!) and I have become more happy and fun-loving. We have definitely retained our original gifts, but have left each other better for our being together. No one would have given much hope that a 19 year old girl and 20 year-old boy getting married would have created so much magic for this batch of kids. The odds were against us. I cannot believe, as I look at you (gorgeous old surfer dude), that we got together and are celebrating 35 amazing years together.

Hah, you’re just sayin that (but keep on doin it!). It is crazy how we somehow navigated the journey of young marriage – don’t ask me how. I think a lot of people that try don’t. I think it’s harder today than it was even just 35 years ago. But here we are. And I’m happy. Seriously. Because I have someone to love and talk and laugh with. Someone to share life and experience with. Funny that we’re way different, that’s for sure. I like spending time with you.

Spending time together has changed so much. It started with just us two all the time—for a very short time. Then it was caring for, chasing and playing with LOTS of kids. Then embracing the teen/baby balance. Moving into the only-teens excitement. Serving in church together has brought immense joy to us both. Now it is completing the crossword together, laughing over probation and seminary stories (with high security verbiage on both). Consoling each other with back and knee pain, and sharing the horror that all this fun is closer to ending than it ever has been. All that is left now is laughing and laughing more and growing old together. I love you. Thanks for the memories and all the joy yet to come. Happy anniversary, my eternal sweetheart.

When I was younger and the older folks would say stuff like, “I thought we loved each other when we were younger, but now I really know a lot more of what love means” - I would think, “yeah, yeah, get off the stage with the sentimental stuff”. What a twirp. Sorry to all those old folks that are probably dead now. ‘Cause, uh, yeah. I kinda get it now. There is something inside of me that is so tightly bound to you – it runs deep. I love you and our life together.

Happy Birthday to Miriam.

Dad


Backpacking was and is a favorite Medley past time. Mirs got her introduction when she was about 11 years old. I look at trips as a whole -  that is you have a bad one and 3 good ones to make up for it. Unfortunately, the first one we took Mirs on was one of those "bad" ones. I guess none are totally 'bad" but when we hike for 4 or 5 hours in the dark with flashlights and the wind is blowing about 25 miles an hour (all night) and Hannah almost gets blown off the cliff. I think we freaked poor Mirs out! Sorry Miriam - I should have been a bit more sensitive to your tender young self-esteem. I guess after that trip you decided you did not like backpacking and hence wondered how you would ever fit into the Medley's! I'm glad we had a bunch after that that were great - hopefully they made up for that first one... Years went by - too quickly of course -  and Mirs found her self near the end of her senior year of high school with an interesting dilemma. She was an outstanding piano player, but did not have the grades or units to get into college. Hence began her "endless summer" between her high school senior and college freshman year. It was seamless - you started CR before school ended and byu online english ended just as HSU started. I'll never forget going down to the bay area for that Shostakovich or Rachmaninov stuff and hearing you play with some hoity- toity orchestra. My kid! Ya rock mirs. I love how you can always count on Mirs for a deep conversation - she's a thinker. Love ya mirs - you treat your family well - you are a good example -  keep up the good teaching too! love Dad

Mom

My fondest memory of Miriam is how she kept changing in and out of her clothes all day long. She must have changed at least 50 times from the time she woke up to the time she went to bed most of her childhood! She was excessively fashion-conscious. She had to wear certain little dresses with foo-foos and frills (in an athletic way). She had a pair of “tappy shoes” that she wore to school. Mrs. Piland called me and asked if I would please have her wear tennis shoes so that she wouldn’t slip! Tennis shoes were safer! I told Miriam the news and we decided to leave the tappy shoes at home. A few days later, Mrs. Piland called me and said that the tappy shoes were becoming a problem! I told her Miriam had left them at home! She just laughed and said that Miriam would change into them when she got to school (having smuggled them in her backpack). Happy Birthday Miriam!! I feel like you always live your life in your tappy shoes!!!!

Rachel

The first memory I thought of was a recent one, when you and Aaron came to visit and how much fun we had. It is so rare to get one of my siblings completely to myself and I had you for like 5 days! I loved all the conversations we had and all the reminiscing. And getting to hang out with Jade and get to know her too, what a fun time! Love you little sister. You'll always be little MIriam to me!! Love, Rachel

Sarah

Oh Miriam. I have so many memories of you. I want to do something different. I want to tell you all the things I love about you now. You have an innate sense of people. You are someone who can almost always finish my sentences. We have had deep conversations where there are pauses, and we look at each other, and there is electricity in the air. You get me, I get you. I love it. Your becoming a mother is a stage that has been beautiful to behold. You are so gracious in the way you accept and take advice from us, even when I'm sure you're sick of hearing it. You have a mother-bear relationship with Jade and it is so beautiful to see, especially since you were so worried that you would not be the best "baby person". Get real!! You possess more musical talent in your pinky than I possess in my whole brain, and I've always been jealous! Thank you for being an amazing woman, Miriam. I love you with all my heart.

Hannah

Miriam, the fancy little girl with the star shaped glasses, pink dresses, and full of attitude. I have always loved every little thing about you Mirs. From the imaginary lines in the house to the continual need for crutches, what a fantastic person you have always been. Suddenly, before I left on my mission we somehow became very close. Writing back and forth for the time I was gone, we seemed to become even closer, a type of kindred spirits. Thank you for all your fantastic letters while I was out there. Your testimony helped me go and teach everyday. For such a young girl, you had an amazing testimony of the Savior, who you are and where you came from. Your love for your family and for Heavenly Father gave me so much strength. Then to see it full circle was to travel down to San Antonio and see the great work you had done in your time served there. You really did (and continue to) let your light shine. I will forever be thankful for that Miriam. Now, seeing you as a mother is awesome. Little Jade is so lucky to have you and Aaron is one fortunate guy to have you. Now it is a treasured treat each time I get to spend time with you. I love how we can just sit and chat with nothing else planned, it is a blast. You deserve an awesome gift and one day when I am rich and famous, I'll get you that gift. I am so happy we have each other. Love you and Happy Birthday!!

Jared

One day we were at home and Mom and Dad were gone. There was some kind of altercation in the living room in which Miriam became the focal point of some aggressive energy. She went outside, slammed the door behind her which we all thought was the end of the altercation. Just then, the door flew open and the toilet plunger went sailing over our heads and we watched in slow motion as the handle of the plunger impaled Aunt Fran’s family portrait that sat on the piano. Miriam looked petrified. It was hard to tell whether she felt that her anger had been sufficiently released, or she was terrified of what she had actually done. There were probably thoughts going through her head of regret/terror/ psychological dominance over everyone in the room. I don’t remember anything after that, I’m not sure what kind of punishment ensued (if any). What has always stuck with me is my awe of Miriam’s ability to accomplish the seemingly insurmountable. Sometimes I still think about the figurative toilet plunger flying through the air over my head... 

Happy Birthday Miriam!!

Gideon

My best memories of Miriam are from about 6 years ago when I moved to utah. She lived a mile or two away, and we saw her often. I loved driving down and spending time at her apartment or giving her a ride. Miriam was such a good friend to me when I started out on my own. She set me up on a date or two (bad idea when your brother is 18 and clueless) and was always down for a climb at the quarry. Miriam has always been so happy and enthusiastic and encouraging. She always is excited to see you. I have lots of memories too of hanging out with Miriam in high school (also a bad idea when your brother is 14 and clueless) and when she was at HSU. Miriam has always been such a good friend to me. Thanks Miriam, and we love you.

Gideon.

Naomi

There is so much about Miriam that I would love to say. I remember when she was in high school, she asked me what I thought about something. I didn't respond. "Do you think about anything?" "Not really." I have changed since then I assure you. But there is one thing in particular that Miriam and I will always treasure in our hearts. That one summer. Miriam got off her mission around April and two weeks later played the piano for my cello final. That summer was the best summer we had together. I had grown so much since she had left on her mission and I felt like we were the same age. We drove the volvo everywhere, went everywhere together and had a blast. It wasn't until I ran out of money that we even thought about getting jobs. We worked for two and half months and saved up enough to take a trip to Florida to visit Sarah for two weeks. That summer, we headed the Humboldt Branch Relief Society, broke down on the way to Utah, Miriam met Aaron while he was on a date with me, bought way too many hand me down clothes, and we both got awesome tans. That summer allowed Miriam and I to become closer sisters. She knows now that I do "think" and can even articulate what I am thinking. I love you Miriam. Have a very happy birthday. 

Bethany

I remember when we were sharing rooms and she came home one night from college and it was really late. We were both in our beds and the lights were out. We tried to make the funniest noises we could and most of them were fart noises! We stayed up for hours making funny noises!!! This next memory has to do with farts, too, but ya know, we are the Medleys... Me, Miriam and Naomi were staying the night in one of the high schooler rooms and I farted, they laughed and my excuse was it just kind of “wheezed out”! They started busting up laughing and we spent the next half hour coming up with different names for different kinds of farts! I also remember this one night I woke up and had a ear ache. I woke up and the light was on and Miriam had just come home and was working on homework. My ear hurt incredibly bad. Worse than I had ever felt. I couldn’t move my head and I was sitting there crying. Miriam went and got me some medicine and some water and carried me upstairs to Mom’s bed. She sat with me while I cried and hurt so bad. She stayed with me and made things so much better. Love you Miriam!

Isaac

I remember once when she was having a concert and she was playing the piano. When she was done, I ran up there on the stage and I was in my black pants and light blue button up shirt. I gave her the bouquet of flowers. Mom made me do it!! Happy Bday Miriam.

Waves

Today I am particularly sensitive to the growing up of my children and grandchildren. I am in Utah surrounded by many of them. I am away from my two youngest. So the stage is set for some pondering and introspection.

Each time something happens over the years, I feel the dreaded tug of something forcing me to relinquish my grasp on my babies' childhood. Tears, pleading, praying, writing, screaming cannot change the tide. It comes uncaring of a mothers' heart breaking. I feel the sand pulling under my feet. I see the wave draw outward relentlessly, rhythmically, predictably. My mother tears are carried away as refuse.

All I can do was wait. Wait for the magical new tide to bring newness and wonder. Do my babies still know me? Do they know I love them uncomprehendingly? Do they remember my smiles, my touches, my hugs and my voice. Each time I wait. And it comes, splashing joyfully. Always. Different but always.

I love the ocean. Countless times I have stood at the edge and felt the ocean pull out, the sand gathering out from under my bare feet. The building wave is beautiful, eager to swallow up the empty sand. It crashes back onto the shore, into my legs. Happy, crazy, joyous, foaming and lovely.

I have stood on a shore during this month. I have felt the tide pull out for the last 33 years. I am here under the wave, giggling, laughing, eating, tumbling. Girls' night out, births, photos, babies, shopping, secrets, eating, hugging, laughing and laughing, sharing, praying, absorbing, helping...

The tide will pull out again, I know. But for a few more days it is delicious.
(August 2011)

Mom - Everyone should read this. Thoroughly.

July 2, 1957

Rachel

This time of year holds so many wonderful memories of summer. Mom's birthday always sticks out in my mind because it's so close to the 4th of july. The grimy, sweaty kids running around Grandma's house with berry-stained hands, orange clay-mud all over shoes and pant legs, building grass forts in the freshly mowed field, and climbing all over that old barn in the meadow before it finally fell down. Cooking out and fireworks seemed always synonymous with drizzle, since we never really had the best luck with the weather. There was always a cake though, and ice cream because it was mom's birthday! 

One thing about mom that I really love is that despite the unthinkably difficult years of raising rowdy kids, she always canned stuff. Any sane person in their right mind would just go on down to the supermarket and by cans of stuff already in cans, saving the hours and mess of canning fruit and jams. But I don't know if it was her desire to teach us how to do it or a need to save money, but either way, we came out on top. Almost nobody my age has ever canned or preserved anything...it's a dying art. When I tell people that my mother canned all summer and how many kids there were, they can't believe it. Thanks mom. I learned more from you than you will ever know!!

Love you.

Sarah

We are driving down a highway along the Atlantic coast on this special day, moms birthday. I keep looking at the trees that line the freeway wishing I knew their names, how they behaved, their approximate age... mom would know. Yesterday I found myself sitting, staring at a bag of "treasures", some blank paper and a pen. I thought long and hard how to put together a good treasure hunt. It was good, but Mom's would have been so much better. I planted a garden a few weeks ago. Everything we planted reminded me of Mom since she headed up last year's garden, my first! Mom, you are so much a part of me. Only a blurry line exists where you end and I begin. I owe so much to you!! Happy birthday!!

Hannah

Mom-you are a very special woman. How can I write something that would illustrate the magnitude of what you have done for me? On your birthday, I think of all you deserve. Among those are a long romantic vacation with dad, a million dollars, and a day at the spa. Since I am still poor in funds, I am going to resort to a special note, just for you. Mom I fought you tooth and nail every day when you would get us out of bed for morning devotional but since your level of stubbornness was slightly more developed than mine, you won. Every time. And to this day, I still know all the Articles of Faith, all the poetry and even remember the president books. I have grown up to be a strong woman too and I attribute that to my upbringing. I believe that before I came to earth, I knew you, I chose you as my mom and you chose me as your daughter. Probably the best choice I ever made. I remember being on the other side of the world in Australia teaching the Gospel. I loved the work so much and had countless life changing experiences. Yet I found the most strength in the letters from home. I know I insisted you and dad write me instead of email (I know that was a little lame of me). But the testimonies that you and dad would share with me seemed to give me the strength to carry on when I felt like I had reached the point of exhaustion. You never cease to amaze me with your continued strength and determination. Thank you for being there for me mom. I hope and pray I can be even half the mother that you were to me. Happy Birthday mom. I love you.

Miriam

Mom, I remember writing you a letter when I was about 13 or 14 telling you that I knew you were meant to be my mother, and that I was sent to you. You've given me so many memories I cannot begin to tell them all. To name a few; SQUIRT. I loved it, I love it. I wish Jade would do squirt with me now. All in good time. JOB CARDS. I loved checking off my jobs on the laminated 3x5 cards every summer. My guardian helped me. You brought us close to each other every time you could. MUSIC LESSONS. Driving all the way to Fieldbrook, paying for months and months of lessons, harassing us to practice, all the performances. DEVOTIONAL. The spirit, it was there every time. I loved the poems (although I couldn't recite one for you if my life depended on it-I failed you there, sorry) and I loved what I learned about coming together as a family. SCRIPTURE STUDY. You fought for it. You fought for it with so many of us. I'm so grateful you did. My love for the scriptures started there. PATRIOTISM. We sang the star spangled banner every time we went by the big flag on the way to Mckinleyville. TEARS. Mom, you are emotional at every turn. Every happy or sad ending of a movie, in church, at pack meeting, at family get togethers. You have a gift and you are sensitive to the spirit. Thanks for teaching us all to be sensitive to what's important in life, treating others with love and respect, and taking pride in who we are. Mom, you are everything to our family. I thank my Heavenly Father for you. Happy Birthday. 

Gideon

Some of my greatest memories are summer days at the Arcata pool. I remember mom taking us every day, every summer. We longed for the last day of swimming when we could finally get a Popsicle and an allotment for gummy bears or licorice. Mom always diplomatically solved the eternal battle between the playhouse and cannon. She coached us on how to manage the emotional trauma of the high dive. I love those memories of mom spending time with us during the day, I am lucky to have had you as a mom back then and I'm lucky now to get calls from you about all the great things you still do. Thanks for being such a great example to all of us. Thank you for showing us what the gospel can do to change your life, and helping me to live in those dangerous younger years. Love you mom, and happy birthday. 

Naomi

Mom. What a wonderful lady you are. Many of my teachers have told me that I must have a wonderful mother if I can do all the things I do. I assure them that she is. 

One thing that I always will remember about mom is canning. Twice a year, hundreds of boxes would take over our yard and more than we expected would usually be left at our house by sunset. We all know how incredibly awesome moms Apricot jam is, how like candy her canned pears are and how one person could easily eat an entire jar of canned peaches. Since leaving home, I always look forward to those phone calls around fruit time when mom calls me and gives me an update. Surprisingly, I miss the phone ringing off the hook with old ladies asking for "the fruit lady." I love moms outlook on life, her free spirit and her hard work ethic. I am so glad she taught us that. I am sad I cant be home this year to give you a little celebration. I love you. I hope your birthday is wonderful. 

Sarah

June 14, 1979

Dad

The story is told about the child that alarmed everyone by not saying a word till she was 4 years old - turns out the reason was that she didn't need anything and life was fine. When I look at pictures of young Sarah, I am reminded of that. She looks so serene and content. It was probably just that Rachel took all the airspace!  Later on Sarah was watchin Rachel's back - ya did a good cover, Sarah! Ya loved your sis. Ya didn't even roll on her for the Dr. Humboldt medicine- man, there's loyalty! Sarah turned into the rebel herself later. I'm sure she would have ended up on probation if her "stealing the admit slips and forging signatures and selling them for 5 bucks" criminal ring with S. Smith at Eureka High School would have been discovered... Who could forget Sarah's "vivacious" demeanor for early morning seminary! I'd come up with one of my early moring corny jokes and she would give me the death stare. I think she actually took a blanket and slept in the back. Once I came home after working very early in the morning and her best friend Laurel was leaving our house - they begged me not to tell that she had spent the night without permission. I found out years after the fact that Sarah and her friends (maybe even with her sister Hannah?) used to ditch school for the whole day and go to Benbow and swim and sunbathe all day. Sarah loves the outdoors and hiking the JMT in 17 days after high schoool graduation was the ultimate! I found out just recently that she almost starved when she moved to Utah after High School. Who could forget some of the guys she brought back for us to meet? All extremes it seems. Thank goodness she found that Jake guy... She has evolved into a wonderful person and mother/friend/wife/daughter/wanna-be activist and not-so closet-feminist. She writes about motherhood and life with a style and insight that is broadly recognized. Ya rock Sarah - hope you always stay amazed.  d

Hannah

Sarah your birthday always reminds me that the year is half over! There are so so many memories that I share with you. From the Silver Tabs to the child rearing. I feel like we have always been close but the point in which I felt we really grew the closest is when I had Kayla. Suddenly I realized what drove you to put every bit of your heart in to what you do. The point in which I realized how truly loving you are is when I sat in my condo in Bountiful when Kayla was a few days old. I was alone with her and I was crying out of control. I couldn't get her to nurse. I called you, hysterical. It was 10:30 at night. You left your house in Lehi and drove to Bountiful. You worked with me for some time and helped little baby Kayla learn to nurse. I cried then because I was happy, I felt you helped my defeat this challenge. That is only an example of your selfless sisterly love that trumps anything else. I could go on and on about the childhood memories of my big lipped, beautiful, and crazy sister just 18 months older than I. I am truly thankful I have had the opportunity to share my childhood and adult life with such a stalwart friend. I am so lucky to have you. Thank you for being who you are. Happy birthday and I look forward to the many more birthdays to come.

Jared

I remember driving to Indio California to meet up with Sarah and Katie to see one of the most talented groups of musicians ever to have combined their talents. We were all so excited and Sarah and Katie blasted their music all the way there. Being around all the people at coachella was like skimming the top of a pool of dirty water. When nickel creek took the stage, a sense of euphoria overtook us and I will never forget Sarah singing louder than Chris Thile. I think he looked over at Sarah swaying violently with her eyes closed. That was such an amazing experience that I will always remember every detail down to the smell of the grass. "grass" 

Miriam

Sarah and I used to write letters back and forth when she lived in Provo. I've kept all of them and they say the sweetest things. You have always been such a caring big sister. I'll never forget when you took me, Gideon and Naomi to the water slide park in Redding one summer. We had so much fun and our budget only allowed us a single bun from Subway. Not even a whole sandwich. I call that real living. Don't let anything keep you from havin' an adventure. Sarah, you've always had the biggest heart ad been the most loving big sister. You take it upon yourself to love and care for all of us and we feel it! I feel lucky that we get to see each other EVERY week. Your girls are so beautiful and they are lucky that you are their mother. You are so wonderful!

Naomi

Sarah was always so much older than me. She would brings friends home from high school and they were so old. She brought friends home from college and they were old! Over the past few years, Sarah has let me grow up to be as old as she is. We talk about too many things to count and I feel like we are the same age. Sarah has always been interested in what I am doing with my life. On my way to class, I'll give her a call and we will chat for only a few minutes. Some people talk to siblings for hours at a time. Our lives are busy. I dont have that kind of time. Sarah lets me have five minutes here and three minutes there. Those little phone calls are what keep us so close. Thanks Sarah. Thanks for being such a great big sister. For sharing your kids. Sharing your home. Sharing your love for the world around you with us. Love you.

Read an awesome quote today.

“Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved piece, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming ‑‑WOW ‑‑ WHAT A RIDE!”

Dad

May 6, 1956

Sarah

I love, "I just figured hey". I think I laughed for like hours over that saying over the years. It's SO dad. 

One of my best memories of dad is when he took us canoeing before school one morning in the humboldt bay. I was in elementary school. He wouldn't tell us where we were going while driving in the vw bus (even though there was a canoe strapped on the roof rack). So we pulled up to the dock and we were excited and anxious. It was a bright clear, cold morning and we wore our beat up life jackets and tried to help dad move the canoe through the water. I remember bragging to my friends for years about how my dad took us canoeing before school ALL THE TIME (which I think he really only took us that one time). It was so awesome! I had no other friends who's dad ever did that! 

Another memory I have is when we hiked the JMT with Laurel. That will forever go down in my mind's recesses as the time when I truly got to know Dad. No pressures on time, no outside stresses. Just conversations meandering through the wilderness for 17 days. I count myself lucky to have had that experience with Dad. Truly, he had no choice. Laurel and I are very persuasive! :)

Happy Birthday Dad.

Hannah

Daddy's hoooooooome. The crowds of children would run frantically out the front door and to the volkswagon bus that pulled up with hard-working dad in it. Outside the Oregon Street house was a party when Dad came home. There were usually 3 children dripping from his arms, another few from his legs and others were fighting to get part of one of his limbs. He always had a smile on his face, seemed happy to see his sea of children every evening after work. This was even after a day of phonecalls to his workplace at least 20 times during the day. Between the kids that were able to use the phone and the few calls mom would place, he would be bombarded. Yet we never knew until we became adults, that the boss asked time and time again to limit the incoming calls. Yet Dad, you just couldn't bring yourself to tell us that we couldn't call. Seems like you have kept this going. Now, 20 or so years later, you still make yourself available for your kids. 1000 miles away and I still feel like you are there for me. I don't ever feel like calling you will be a burden and I always feel you like talking to me.

There is no way I could summarize the memories in one post, there are far too many. But Dad, you gave me much more than I could have asked for. A childhood full of adventure, love, laughter, and humor. You deserve to have a fantastic birthday!! Love you Dad!! 

Jared

If someone asked me what I thought was the mist significant experience I had with dad, my memory takes me to what led to the most devastating botanical experience of his life. As part of my environmental science merit badge, I was reluctantly entrusted with a delicate fern dad rescued on a backpacking trip. Unintentionally, I swiftly destroyed it. I don't think I realized how devastated dad was, but he didn't breathe a word of frustration or resentment. I've always admired dad's patience and love for those around him. I'm grateful for his great example. Thanks dad

Miriam

I'll never forget when dad asked me "When does your heart rest?...between beats." Ha ha. That was awesome. I never forgot that. That's dad in a nutshell. Always livin up life to the fullest. We went on a backpacking trip the summer before I left for BYU and we counted the hours and dad fit in as much hiking as he could in those 72 hours. Boy, did we feel it too. But that wasn't any different from any other hiking trip with dad:) Always a death hike! 

Dad, there are too many memories to fit into a few paragraphs. All I can say is that I am who I am today because of all your dad-isms and your unfailing optimism. I remember the very day I asked you what that word meant. Optimism. You should have just said "me."

Love ya dad.

Naomi

Dad. Where do you even start with a guy like this? Ill start with this. I was talking to you on the phone the other night right after the sun had gone over the horizon. You said you were in the front yard leaning up against the ol' Volvo. The moon was out and told me to check it out. I stepped outside and looked to the west to see a sliver of the moon. It was "pretty cool lookin" as you had said. You said, "Isn't it amazing that we are looking at the same moon right now?" I was a thousand miles away but Dad and I were looking at the moon together. We spotted a few constellations together as well. The tears welled. I miss sitting in the back yard, on the beach, on a mountain top in the wee hours of the morning, or by a lake in the mountains and listening to Dad admire everything around him. His favorite primary song is " Whenever I hear the song of a bird or walk by a lilac tree." I love dads admiration of the earth and its gifts to us.

I love Dads hands. They are so big and strong. They surf. They plant daffodils. They pull his glasses out of his shirt pocket. They fed his kids for 25 years by getting grease and cuts from fixing cars. They held each of us. They blessed us every year before starting school. They have always been there to hug me. They hold mom. I can not wait to someday put my children in those wonderful, beautiful hands.

I love you Dad. Happy Birthday. You're 55 years young.

Bethany

April 17, 1994

Rachel

Dear, dear Bethany...I remember when you were so little! I remember you crying and making a ruckus in church, and Jared was SO lucky, he got to take you out into the foyer and take a breather from sacrament meeting. The thing that I think of first every time I think of you is your spazz-ness, and I mean that only in the most loving way!! You are so dramatic, and have so much energy! You remind me a lot of myself actually. It seems like you went from tiny to teenager so quickly. You are such a loving sister to Isaac, that is what really impresses me about you. You are so patient and loving towards him, and seeing the friendship you two have is so touching! 

One special memory I have of you is actually very recent, but it really affected me and I remember it so fondly. It was when I came home for a long weekend when Grandma was sick. The last night before I was supposed to leave, you slept in the spare room with me and we stayed up for a while talking. You told me about Mateo and school, and I was so tired but I treasured that so much!! I fought like crazy to stay awake because now my little baby sister was talking to me like we were teenagers having a slumber party and I didn't want to miss a second of it. I would give anything to be back in that moment right now and be able to live it again, just for a little while.

I love you so much Bethany, Happy Birthday! Stop growing up so fast!

Love you.

Rach

Sarah

Bethany was always the one who we babied. She made us laugh constantly. She was ADORABLE. She was the skinniest little thing and would often skip dinner because of all the candy we fed her after school. We'd give her candy to hang out with us. We wanted to tease her and tickle her and then generally just love her. She was always smiling and laughing and doing funny things. I remember coming home to visit from college and we would do the "walk on the bum" game all the time. She loved it. She was one of the first ones to burst out of the front door and run toward my car when I pulled up. She's always represented sweetness and love. No judgement, no hard feelings. I don't think I've ever seen her mad (but I didn't live with her during her teenage years, so I'm not exactly sure). I love you Bethany. Happy Birthday.  

Hannah

Bethany: You were also known as "My Baby." From a very young age, I was rescuing you from your guardian, Jared. Each time I would come home from Yreka, you would run out and I would pick you up. You have always been a spunky, sweet, beautiful little thing and I just love you. One of the saddest days of my life was when Bethany officially learned to say the letter "R." I missed your adorable speech impediment when it left. And what you used to be as a child has only proven to be a precursor to what you have become as a young lady. You are strong, lovely, faithful and still, as always, spunky. I look up to you, Bethany, for your burning desire to do what is right. You are a leader to all you come in contact with. When you graduate highschool, you will be going on to bigger things. Stay as strong as you are now. Pursue your dreams and passions, be everything you want to be little Bethany. Now that I have become at peace with your ability to say your "R"s, I am ready for you to grow up and follow your dreams. Just whatever you do, never change who you are. You are special and amazing. A true gem. 

Love you Bethany.  

Miriam

Bethany was my roommate. The two years I went to HSU, me and Bethany shared a room. She used to snore EVERY night and, I admit, I may have resorted to pinching her nose shut to get her to wake up and turn over. Then she finally got her tonsils taken out and it helped immensely. We would make farting noises and almost pee our pants laughing so hard. Guess I really hadn't grown up much by attending college. I'll never forget the night she said to me "Miriam, do you ever think about the stars? I try and think about them and it's like my mind wants to go past them but it just can't, no matter how hard I try." That's a deep thought for a 7 year old. And that analytical brain has never quit. We had a lot of spiritual conversations too. Little Bethany. A deep, wise little spirit you are. All my love roommate:) Happy Birthday.

*So, facebook won't let you download their pictures to your computer and I don't have any pictures of you on my computer so sorry it's pictureless:(

Dad flying in NC.